Mom lives in Florida, you’re in Indiana, and your brother is preoccupied with his in-laws in Vermont. Still, everyone should get on the same page about your parents expectations. First decide whether you or a sibling will start the conversation, then clearly communicate that you’re there for your parents, despite the hundreds of miles that separate everyone. Ask them to share their long-term plans, for both their finances and day-to-day care. Your family also want to consider hiring a senior-care expert to assess safety issues in your parents home, advocate for them, and mediate family discussions (find one at aginglifecare.org). An initial consultation can range from $300 to $800, and additional services can cost between $100 and $250 per hour. Always stay in the loop–and don’t be shy about passing the Mom-and-Dad baton to a sibling if your parents are avoiding the conversation. Sometimes all it takes is another voice to get people to listen. It can be frustrating but it just might do the trick.